Howdy doodie....boy what a few weeks I have had. I cannot believe I haven't posted for over a week. There are lots of reasons for it so please forgive me.
It has been a complicated few weeks. My dad, whom I only just rediscovered just over a year ago, having not seen him since I was 12, has been in hospital with a heart condition. I've been calling the hospital daily and sorting out getting him a GP and coordinating with my uncle who visits him. I'm in Ireland, he is in Manchester and I can't just turn up. I have not met the man yet and it is hard to work out how involved I am meant to be. I'm not his next of kin, my uncle is but both my uncle and my dad made sure the hospital knew to keep me informed so that is something.
My best friend's hubby is sadly nearing his final days and they are both only 41 years old. I hate to see my friend going through what she is and it is harder still because again, she is in the UK and I am in Ireland. I'm doing what I can but to be honest, I can only be a friend on the end of the phone to her. Ironically I am in the UK next week, having a break with my hubby and sons but I will be in Norfolk, my home town and that is such a long way away from my dad and my friend. I just don't have the energy at the moment to drive all around the UK on a week put aside for some quality time with my children to thank them for being so great whilst I was having chemo and to make happy memories. I need some mummy time with them and just with them. It might sound a bit selfish but they have been through such a lot. The week is for them.
My baby is 12 today ( so not really a baby),so we have had a great time taking him out to use his new camera and we went to see Men in Black and treated him to tea out. It was nice, and he said to me ' Mum, you only have to stay alive four years now!'. This is because when I was diagnosed I told my surgeon he had to do what he could to give me five years: to see my son reach 16 and adulthood. Bless him, I had to laugh. I know what he meant ;-)
I volunteer down the ISPCA on Saturdays which is both heart breaking (you can go right off the human race) but also rewarding. I cannot for the life of me understand how people can be so cruel to animals. It really must take far more effort than it does to care for them and see to their basic needs. A result of me helping is that we are adopting a boxer dog cross from the ISPCA and I am going to look at two horses tomorrow to see about offering them a forever home..so lots of change and lots of pressure at a time I still feel a bit delicate myself. However, I am trying to pace myself and remind myself that it is ok to feel crap at times and it is ok to sometimes step away from other's problems.
On top of this I am not sleeping and when I get tired the fear and insecurity regarding the C word creeps in leaving me quite flat (no..not that word!..honestly, what are your minds like????? Cancer is the one I mean).
Also, because I am tired my eyes hurt. Seriously, I cannot remember the last time I got more than three hours sleep in one block. My eyes hurt so I cannot stitch and of course stitching is one of the things we do to keep stress free and sane isn't it? So I am not so sane at the moment ;-)
I have done a little on my Feathered Friends. Boy it seems to take a long time to stitch. This is where I was;
And this is where I am;
I have also been quilting.
Yes, you read right. I bought a panel and have attached fabric around it and have a mixture of machine quilting and hand quilting going on. I want to finish it a bit more before I show it if that is ok.
Also, I found a great quilting tutorial online and spent three hours cutting up a layer cake I had for this Layer Cake Quilt...only to realise I needed more than just my layer cake frazzle frazzle.....so I had to order some more material to match it for the bits inbetween the blocks...again, I will show you when I have actually done some of it.
I know some of you are fantastic quilters but I am a perfectionist and panic when cutting material as it is never as science precise as I think in my mind it should be. I have started to go to a quilter's group though and I have realised it doesn't have to be precise..close to it but not exact. So I have started relaxing and just going for it and so far so good.
Right; that is me done for now.
I will have more piccies to show next time but it is late and I am going to give in and have a wee tablet to see if I can have a bit of sleep.
Have a great week everyone and chat soon.